Sticks and Stones…… Willy’s Way West(?) Backblast 10-1-19


Sticks and Stones…..


Launch Conditions: 62 degrees. Foggy. A bit damp from the overnight precipitation.
Pax: HIPAA (QIC), Lassie, Wildcat, Yosef

Mileage: 2.67 miles

Difficulty: Full Hugh Glass

Disclaimer: Check.

The Thang:

Gather at Launch. Unload wooden posts from Q’s car.

Mosey to small, paved parking lot.

Warm O Rama.

Mosey to State Farm Lot.

Looks like somebody “forgot” a few cinder blocks in the parking lot. Nothing goes with wooden posts like cinder blocks. Only one thing to do:


Partner 1 does as many wood post squats as possible. Partner 2 runs with cinder block around second light pole.


P1 does as many cinder shoulder presses as possible. Partner 2 runs with wooden post around light pole.


Same with thrusters, followed by curls.

Mosey with coupons to the base of Mt. Nickelback. Gentlemen, I give you:

Mt. Nickelback Coupon Suicides of Death

mt nickelback

Partner One starts running up Mt. Nickelback carrying the cinder block. Partner One leaves the cinder block at the first switchback and runs back down to start. Meanwhile, Partner Two is doing jump squats, Bonnie Blairs, and Apollo Anton Onos, eagerly awaiting Partner One’s return.


Partner Two runs up to where the first cinder block was left, picks it up and carries it up to the second switchback.


Partner One runs back up, picks up the cinder block, drops it off at the top, and returns back to the start.

Same thing all the way to the top with wooden posts…………………….

Finish with a run up to the top to retrieve the coupons and then mosey back down and back to launch.

Ain’t nobody got time for Mary round here.



Brutal. And Beautiful. Bru-tiful. Welcome to Knob Week, Boone. Hope you like pain.

YHC was running about 30 seconds late due to dropping off the cinder blocks in an inconspicuous place for later use. Wilcat was grouchy about that. Murmured something about starting late. YHC paid it back with interest at the end.

Yosef was early and crushed it without complaint. Thought he was going to yarf at the top of Mt. Nickelback on the last run up to the top.

Lassie. What to say about Lassie. He crushed it. While carrying his iPhone the whole time (somehow). Don’t ask, don’t tell.

We encountered another group (team?) at the State Farm Lot. Fortunately, they did not notify the authorities (as far as we know), but probably will have trouble sleeping tonight.



Monday – Willy’s Way West – Bootcamp
Legends, 190 Hardin St, Boone, NC 28607

Tuesday – Foxfire – Bootcamp
5:15am – 6:00am
Boone Greenway at Clawson-Burnley Park:
355 Hunting Hills Ln, Boone, NC 28607

Wednesday – Musket – Bootcamp


Legends, 190 Hardin St, Boone, NC 28607


Thursday – 5:30pm – Meetup with East Boone Running Club at 5:30pm at Booneshine (followed by beer and 2nd F)

Friday – Open.

Saturday – The Homestead at Respect Park
Saturday 7am – 8am
Boone Greenway at Clawson-Burnley Park:
355 Hunting Hills Ln, Boone, NC 28607

@HIPAA_F3 @GlobeMtnMadMan @jarboeboone @LabRat_F3 @TravisCritcher

Race to the Bottom – Musket Backblast 9-18-19


Race to the Bottom


Launch Conditions: 58 degrees.
Pax: Armor, HIPAA (QIC), Lassie, Zippy

Mileage: 2+ miles? YHC forgot his watch….
Difficulty: Jack Chapman.

Disclaimer: Check.


Mosey to park. Start as group. At each bench do 5 single leg step ups (each leg). If you catch the pax ahead of you, you skip the next bench and the pax who was caught must do 5 burpees.

Repeat with decline merkins.

Repeat with Heels to Heaven.

Mosey towards mini Stonehenge. On the way stop for lunge walk up stairs and some merkins for fun.

Arrive at mini Stonehenge. Dips in cadence. LBCs with feet up on bench in cadence.

Mosey to small rock pile. Curls x 100.

Mosey to Launch.




Hey, better late than never. YHC enjoyed the race day atmosphere of the jaunt around the park. It added an element of competition. There is nothing like being chased by Lassie and the prospect of penalty burpees to make you push it. Everyone pushed it out there. Great workout, great fellowship. That’s all I got for today!


We are floating a potential new schedule for comments. See below. Please provide feedback:

Monday – Legends

Tuesday – Park

Wednesday – Legends

Thursday – Meetup with East Boone Running Club at 5:30 at Booneshine (followed by beer)

Friday – Free

Saturday – Park

Weekdays will be at 515a. Saturday will be at 7am.

As always, feedback is encouraged and welcome. New schedule would start the Week of September 30.


Palindrome Festival of Pain – Homestead Backblast 9-14-19


Palindrome Festival of Pain


Launch Conditions: 62ish degrees. Foggy.
Pax: Armor, Chunder, HIPAA (QIC), Lassie, Wildcat, Zippy, Yosef, Reese’s Pieces (FNG)

Mileage: 2.58 miles.
Difficulty: Teddy.

Disclaimer: Robust. Legally adequate.
Strava Map:

Welcome FNG. Disclaimer.

Mosey to paved parking lot.


9 merkins

1 burpee

4 lss

1 burpee

9 mountain climbers

Mosey to Big Lot.

Partner up.

Partner 1 people chair against big red, rusty cargo container. Partner 2 runs to parking barriers and does called exercise. Flapjack.

9 × decline merkins

1 x jump up

4 x dips

9 x dips

1 x jump up

4 x decline

Same sequence, except with balls to the wall.

Mosey to pain station loop.

Switch partners. Partner 1 lbcs, partner 2 run up stairs, 9 decline merkins, 1 incline, 4 dips. Flapjack. Repeato.

Reverse it to other circuit. Run up hill, 9 incline merkins, 1 decline, 4 dips. Flapjack. Repeato.

Mosey to picnic shelter.

9 single leg step ups (each leg), 1 jump up, 4 single leg step ups.

20 x dips


Mosey to base of Mt Nickelback. Select a reasonably sized rock. Partner up. Catch me if you can up mt nickelback. Partner 1 does 4 burpees, partner 2 runs with rock up mt nickelback as far as he can until caught. Flapjack.

At top, best crawl down, lunge walk back while partner does some dolly and freddy mercury. Flapjack.

Mosey back down Mt Nickelback.

9 apollo anton ono, 1 burpee, 4 bonnie blairs.


Grab rocks.

Curls x 20

Shoulder press x 20

Curls x 20

Mosey back towards launch. Pause for the six with some plank o Rama.

Finish mosey back to launch.




Some observations from The Gloom:

Happy palindrome week. This is the last week this century where all of the dates are palindromes.

You’re welcome.

We used the number 91419 a lot today. Thought someone would pick up on it sooner, but I think the pax were just confused. Which means my plan worked perfectly.

The benches at the rear picnic shelters are a little rickety. They might be the original picnic benches used by Daniel Boone. Bend but don’t break. Like the pax this morning.

Yosefs clocks are all a few mins slow. He avoided penalty burpees because YHC was feeling charitable this fine morning. Barely.

Chunder back in the Gloom this morning after being sidelined with SARS/Ebola/H1N1 last several days. He decided to complete this week’s iron pax challenge beforehand. Ouch.

Lassie wrapped his phone in a baggie. I cant even. Brother, I have an arm band you could borrow.

Zippy and armor took turns violating the port o potty pregame. They appeared to be 5 lbs lighter all morning. Really put a bounce in their step.

Solid beatdown. Old school. Simple. No real stragglers. Whole group stayed together for the most part.

Somehow this was zippy’s maiden voyage up Mt Nickelback? That cant be right. Have noticed he is really hitting his stride out there.

#Kotters to armor who was hunting sasquatch all week in southern Canada. I think he left his merkin form on the west coast. He claimed as long as his elbows “broke”, it “counts”. You do you, brother.

Pax were gassed after the run up Mt Nickelback. Total killer. HR monitor hit about 2000 bpm on that one. I believe several iWatches sent out false alarms to local EMTs as a result. Thought I caught a glimpse of a rescue drone through the trees, but we outran it

Welcome FNG Reeses Pieces! Several degrees of separation to get there, but a good story. You have to post to hear it. Wildcat with the EH. Also next door neighbors to Lassie. Who knew.

We are floating a potential new schedule for comments. See below. Please provide feedback:

Monday – Legends
Tuesday – Park
Wednesday – Legends
Thursday – Meetup with East Boone Running Club at 5:30 at Booneshine (followed by beer)
Friday – Free
Saturday – Park
Weekdays will be at 515a. Saturday will be at 7am.

As always, feedback is encouraged and welcome. New schedule would start the Week of September 30.


@HIPAA_F3 @GlobeMtnMadMan @jarboeboone @LabRat_F3 @TravisCritcher

September 11th Musket Backblast – Never Forget.


Never forget.


Launch Conditions: 62ish degrees and foggy.
Pax: HIPAA, Kodak, Lab Rat, Lassie, NAFTA, Wildcat, Zippy

Mileage: 1.62 miles

Gathered at Launch at 5:13. Disclaimer given and pax informed that the COP/warm-o-rama will be done in silence.

110 Floors.
343 firefighters.
4 Planes.
2996 casualties.

COP In Silence

50 SSH
30 LSS
30 IW
Total = 110 Floors

Mosey to Baby Stonehenge.

50 Step ups
50 Backscratchers
50 Lunges
50 LBCs

Mosey to library

25 Onos
50 Heels to Heaven
25 Bonnie Blairs

Mosey to Peacock Hall

43 SSH
Total = 343 firefighters

4 Trips down Hell’s Alley: Bear Crawl Down, Lunge Walk back x2. Plank jack to sprint and mosey back x 2.

4 planes.

Mosey back towards launch. Stop for partner carry up a hill.


Pledge of Allegiance



YHC usually submits pretty over the top backblasts with a lot of what I would call “pyrotechnics”, but YHC did not believe it would be appropriate here. Instead, we will reflect on some more serious things.

Last year Mermaid led the 9/11 workout at Hawk’s Nest in Area51. He did the first half of the workout in silence. We were all surprised and it really started to sink in – the significance of the day and the feeling of something missing. A stark contrast to our usual witty banter. YHC borrowed that idea for COP this morning.

Kodak mentioned he had something to say to the pax at Peacock Hall, so we worked that into the Weinke. Turns out that corner of brick wall was young Kodak sat as a Sophomore (?) at ASU after cramming all night long for an exam, oblivious to what was happening in the world around him. He didn’t realize America was under attack until later in class. Suddenly the world was back into its proper perspective and exam-time stress seemed exceptionally trivial. Kodak invited the pax into an impromptu COT for a few words before continuing back with the beatdown.

As for YHC, I was in my second our third week of law school and groggily walked into the cafe. I honestly thought an amateur pilot had accidentally run into the tower. I was picturing a single-engine Cessna. Then I went to class. Only later that morning did I start to realize what was happening. And I was thankful I was in Northern Indiana.

We all get very comfortable in our daily lives.

What would you do if you knew tonight was your last night? What would you do if you found yourself on that plane on in one of those towers? What would be your biggest regret? What would be your greatest accomplishment? Who would be there to greet you on the other side?

And what would you leave behind?

Closed out the workout with a prayer of thanksgiving for our freedom, our country, and our lives (in that order).


  • Keep an eye out on Slack for IronPax Challenge time and location.
  • Chimbote, Peru F3 Mission Trip – F3 Third F Chimbote Peru is on the books for January 24 – February 2, 2020. Please prayerfully consider this. We are serving the people and supporting F3 Men of Chimbote.



“Running with the Dogs” – Homestead Backblast 9-7-19


Running with the Dogs


Launch Conditions: 62ish degrees. Dry. Dark-ish.
Pax: Chunder, HIPAA, Lassie, DIY

Mileage: 3.34
Difficulty: John Wayne.

Disclaimer: Check.
Strava Map:

Gathered at Launch at 6:58. Disclaimer given and we were off.

Yog way over behind athletic fields. COP.

First Thang:

Big lap around fields. Each bench or sewer cover would be a station. Two pax on bench/sewer opening and two pax on the ground doing the called exercise.

Mosey to covered bridge. Lunge walk down, bear crawl back.

Mosey back through trails to the road. Mosey to paved lot for some Interim Mary.

Mosey back up to the Little Pink House.

Thang 2:

Highway to Heaven. First Pax carries tire all the way around the short lap of the parking lot. Other pax doing heels to heaven. Rotate through all pax. Repeato.

Thang C:

Run up Hunting Hills to the flat part on top. Do some dips on the guardrails.

Mosey back to launch.





Highlights below.

  • Noticed that most of the pax on this morning were runners (read: Lassie, DIY) or could at least run pretty well (read: Chunder) or were leading the workout anyway (read: YHC), so adjusted the workout more towards the higher end of the mileage scale for an hour-long workout.
  • Lassie’s beard game keeps getting stronger and more Mosaic (in the biblical sense; think Charlton Heston) by the week. It has not slowed him down.
  • In addition to Lassie, there was another dog sighting. On the Hunting Hills climb, we rounded the corner and ran face to face with a very big dog walking a very small woman. We all agreed that of course we weren’t scared and if it attacked, we would all join in. YHC told the pax it was actually a planned team building exercise. Lassie related to us the story of the time he actually did get attacked by a mastiff. Not. Fun.
  • Chunder whined a little about the running, but as usual crushed it.
  • Good to see DIY out again. Haven’t run into each other recently in The Gloom.


  • Keep an eye out on Slack for IronPax Challenge time and location. Nothing official, but a few of us have been trying to get together and do this each week. Try it if you haven’t already!


I don’t want to write this backblast (Foxfire Backblast 9-3-19)


I don’t want to write this backblast.


Launch Conditions: 62ish degrees. Clear. Starry.
Pax: Chunder, HIPAA, Armor, Zippy, Lab Rat

Mileage: 2.75 (Armor got 3)
Difficulty: Jack Chapman.

Disclaimer: Given. Accurate due to presence of #Kotters/FNG
Strava Map:

0530 – Muster at Launch #ZuluTime

0531 – Wait for Chunder

0532 – Brief disclaimer and Launch

Start Mosey to Big Lot. Detour to smaller, gravel lot to let Chunder to catch up.

Warm o rama





Mountain Climbers

Mosey out to State Farm Road.

From the entrance to the University Lot, run all the way down to the end of State Farm Road (the Zaxby’s) – about 1 mile total.

On the way, stop with your partner at each street sign and do 10 power merkins and 10 WWII situps each. 6 or 7 street signs, total.

Made it to the end of State Farm, then turned around and came back – same concept, except with 10 CDDs each street.

That was all we had time for.


Mosey back to launch.



Like I mentioned in the title, I really didn’t feel like writing this backblast. It was a long weekend of travel and getting run ragged by the kids and it has been a long day in the office. Have had a lot swirling around in my life lately and this was one of those mornings where I didn’t really have the mental capacity to come up with a creative, thought-provoking workout that features several exotic, new movements from deep in the Exicon. I just wanted to run and work hard and get after it. Simple, brutal, effective. Honestly, if I didn’t know there would be guys standing around in a parking lot waiting for me, I probably would have fartsacked. And if I didn’t have people expecting a write-up, I probably wouldn’t have done the backblast, either. #Accountability

You have times when you carry the pax and other times they carry you. That is what this is all about. F3. Life. The pax really carried me out there today and I owe them a thank you. I didn’t have my best stuff today, but they kept pushing the tempo and picking me up. I can honestly say there have been some really hard mornings to get out of bed and a lot of really painful workouts, but to this day I have never regretted posting at a workout. Never.

Thankful tonight for my F3 brothers for carrying me through.

In other news:

  • Welcome back into the fold Lab Rat! He was a F3 Pax down in Charlotte about 5 years ago, and now getting back to it here in the High Country. There was some discussion about the half-life (shelf-life?) of an F3 nickname. We debated renaming him. Muskrat. Possum. Pinkie and the Brain. Hodor. Ok, last one wasn’t true. Ultimately decided against it. #Kotters to Lab Rat! He crushed it today. Bad luck of the draw on his part for catching me on a “set it and forget it” run and pain station day, but he crushed.
  • Never eaten at a Zaxby’s. I called it a “low rent” Bojangles. And don’t even get me started on Popeyes. Only in NC could you refer to something as “low rent” in comparison to Bo Time. But I meant it. I apologize for nothing.
  • Armor rolled into the lot in one of his several post-Apocalyptic zombie-hunting vehicles and thought I would be too blind to Q. YHC did not realize they made LEDs that bright.
  • Zippy showed strong as usual. I’m not buying any of this stuff about not being a runner.
  • Chunder led the pax all day and always circled back to the six. Appreciate it, brother.


@HIPAA_F3 @GlobeMtnMadMan

Foxfire Backblast 8-27-19 – Lumber Liquidators


Lumber Liquidators – Tongue-and-Groove….


Launch Conditions: A brisk 58 degrees. Foggy.
Pax: Chunder, HIPAA, Kodak, Armor

Mileage: Unknown. QIC forgot his watch.
Difficulty: Hugh Glass.

Disclaimer: Given, but these guys know better. Thanks to Kodak for the assist.
Strava Map:

4 Redwood Originals laid the wood all over Respect Park this morning @F3Boone.

Muster at Shovel Flag at 0530. #ZuluTime

Brief disclaimer to full veteran squad.

Warm o rama




Slippery Dip Can aka ‘baccer pickers aka Don Quixotes aka aka

Arm circles (backwards AND frontwards) #TrainForSymmetry

Mosey to smooth parking lot where wood posts are waiting.

Wood. Basically looked like this.

Hairburners on the wood post – down and back to the end of the first parking lot exit. Partner does called exercise.

  • CDDs
  • Squats
  • Freddy Mercury

Indian run with wood posts to big parking lot. Partner 1 runs with wood on back to third lightpost while partner does:

  • Merkins
  • Lunges
  • Dips

Flapjack and repeato 3x.

Carry wood to Stairs Outpost. Partner 1 does shoulder presses with wood. Partner 2 runs stair circuit. Flapjack. Then:

  • Triceps extension
  • Biceps curl

Repeat 3 x more with exercise of your choice.

Partner 1 – bent over rows with wood block. Partner 2 – LBCs. Flapjack. Repeato.

Mosey back to big lot. Progressive hairburner race. Like suicides without the coming back part. You had to be there.

Mosey back to launch with wood.




Got in the sack early last night (9:30?) because I wanted to be fresh for the pax. Unfortunately I couldn’t fall asleep, so I tossed and turned all night. As a result I was extra surly this morning.

Have been doing some work around the house so found some scrap 4×4 posts, each about 2 or 3 feet long. In all seriousness I hope my contractor didn’t need those posts for anything on the house.


Arrived early to the AO and strategically placed the posts in the smooth new parking lot away from the launch point to give the pax a nasty surprise. If you’re going to use serious coupons, you don’t want them lying out in the open at the beginning. It dampens the mumblechatter and you risk someone seeing them and just pulling an :inout: on you.

“The fake slap invariably makes contact, adding the elements of shock and betrayal to what had previously been plain old-fashioned fear.”

David Sedaris, Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim

Shock and betrayal. And Chunder loved every minute of it. Not even rough hewn pine could dampen his youthful spirit.

Lots of wood jokes out there today. It would be beneath me to repeat them here. You can imagine.

Kodak was on the mend from a flu/ebola/SARS type incident over the weekend that had nothing to do with his side job as a meth cook. Thought he was over it until the cold, hard, wooden reality of Foxfire hit him in the face. #Cobains

Armor was second to roll in the lot, brimming with excitement and self-satisfaction at not fartsacking (small victories, small victories….).

Image result for what about bob baby steps

All [4 of the] pax worked hard today and got better. Hairburners are not easy, especially with wood blocks instead of a metal plate.