Mood Tune: I’m Lovin’ It by Justin Timberlake (get it?)
AO: Willy’s Way West
Conditions: 30 degrees F, every star in the sky visible, mountain crisp, 10/10 Al Rokers
PAX: Chunder, HIPAA, Yosef, Pebbles (FNG), Kodak (Q) = 5
After hacking up lungs and perfecting my SPOT-ON impersonation of Val Kilmer’s depiction of western legend Doc Holliday for almost an entire month, YHC ventured back out into The Gloom to try to regain some of that HIMness that I lost during my bout with what, I can only assume, was a military-grade strength strain of SARs that I picked up from my oldest and most precious 2.0’s Kindergarten class. Mouth full of Hall’s and heart full of hopes, we met in a dark parking lot, with mainly old (familiar) faces, but a fresh (20 year old..ugh) face that was apparently headlocked and wrangled by the wrath of Chunder. More about the FNG later…onto business….
Disclaimer: Solid, due to the presence of the FNG…gotta be responsible for the chil’rens.
Mosey to Founder’s Plaza
The First Bits:
(all in cadence)
Mosey to Hardees
YHC had a theme for his first time back, and that theme revolved around the wonders, and abundance, of fast food close to our AO. What better way to thwart your desires for greasy, meaty, cheese-covered, burnt and crispy around the edges, mouth-wat…….*COUGH, ahem…I’m sorry……..this…this garbage that lines our streets in small-town America, than by sweating it out on their own turf? So with that in mind, we ran up to the drive thru menu…
Each PAX picks an item from the menu…whatever they want. I tell them I’m buying. (though my wallet’s back in the car, and they’re not open yet, I think?)
YHC came up with a legend that the PAX were unaware of. Each item had a themed workout for it. Think of it as the F3 Nation Card Deck of Pain, but with biscuits. Legend as follows:
Anything with beef: Merkins x15
Anything with chicken or eggs: Diamond Merkins x15
Anything with Pork: Peter Parkers x15
Any sides: Side Straddle Hops
Any beverage: Burpees x5
The orders went as followed:
HIPPA: Sausage and Egg Burrito (Peter Parkers and Diamond Merkins)
Yosef: Sausage biscuit (Peter Parkers)
Chunder: Frisco Breakfast Sandwich (uuugghhh….Peter Parkers)
FNG: Bacon, Egg and Cheese biscuit (these mountain boys and their pork…geez…Peter Parkers and Diamond Merkins)
Kodak: (trying to fit everything else in there, and since I’m “buying”, I upped it to a combo) A Frisco Burger combo with hashbrowns and a Coke for everyone! (Merkins, SSHs, Burpees)
With enough Hardees under our belts, and arriving employees staring at us, we Moseyed to our next stop. A cultural destination…The International House of Pancakes.
The ever-aware Chunder quickly informed us that there was no drive thru menu at iHop, which I quickly assured him that this was not lost on me. While there isn’t a menu at iHop, and there’s no ‘I’ in team, but there is in ‘iHop’, along with the word ‘Hop’…screw it. I’m lost. We’re gonna be doing every exercise with a hop in it, so there.
Jump Squats x20
Lap around the building
Apollo Anton Ono’s x20
Bonnie Blair’s x20
Regroup and Mosey to MickeyD’s
Bah-da-bop-buh-baaahhhh, We’re ab-in’ it!
Each PAX is responsible for doing 50 reps of each exercise:
Finally, everyone holds a boat pose for 63 seconds
Significance of reps being: each pair of PAX completed 500 reps, plus 63 seconds of Boats = 563
Number of calories in 1 Big Mac = 563
So, next time you want 2 all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun…just jump out of the drive thru line and do 500+ reps of ab shredding right there in the parking lot. Your body will love you for it. Your family and their embarrassment as horns honk loudly behind you in line?…Not so much.
Mosey back to Founder’s Plaza
Dips x15 (in cadence)
Derkins x15 civilian count
Dips x15 (in cadence)
Irkins x10 (civilian count)
American Hammer x50
Mosey back to AO Launch
Announcements: None really of note, aside from SIGN UP TO LEAD A WORKOUT!
Do it right here:
Willy’s Way West (Monday):https://www.signupgenius.com/go/508054EA4AF2DA75-willys
YHC asks that you continue to remember my family after the passing of my grandfather, and my wife’s family after the passing of her uncle…both within a week of each other.
(Sidenote: We attended the wife’s uncle’s memorial service down in South Carolina on Monday. Surrounded by friends and family, a lot of whom I didn’t know, I look up in the crowd and see none other than DoubleD, an F3 brethren and APPARENTLY a longtime coworker of my wife’s aunt. We laughed, hugged, shared condolences and just couldn’t get over the small, small world we live in. A world full of great men helping and encouraging each other. This group is great, and it never ceases to amaze me.)
Ball of Man.
The moleskin today in describing this workout will be in .gif form, and one inspired by HIPAA during the workout, recalling this scene from Dodgeball:
In other words, exercise is great, but what we fuel ourselves with is just as important. I’m no nutritional saint by any stretch, but just take a moment during this next month (before Thanksgiving, that is…I’m no heartless dictator), to think about your diet, and “Is there some healthy alternative to this third Little Debbie Oatmeal Pie that I could eat instead?”
Now back to Will, our FNG who needs’ah namin’. Will’s young (younger-than-Chunder young), likes photography (Kodak is taken, thank you very much), and spent a lot of time in Boulder, Colorado. Hmmm…?
“Boulder” is too cool. “Pebbles” are smaller and less formidable. “Pebbles” is an adorable cartoon cavegirl…..EVERYONE MEET PEBBLES!
Pebbles showed great work out there, kept it positive, and didn’t question any of the pointless shenanigans that are a part of our “normal morning workouts”. Keep posting bro!
During the ever-important, and always-sacred naming ceremony, Chunder broke the circle and just jaunted off to his car. Oh well, rude… Turns out he had eyed a student desperately and slowly trying to scrape an iced over windshield, so Chunder ran to the rescue with an actual ice scraper and finished the job. High Impact Man indeed. It’s the little things. It’s ALWAYS the little things.
Pleasure to know you. Honored to occasionally lead you. Till next time…
““There is a difference between being a good man and being good at being a man.”-JACK DONOVAN